There is something in life that connects us all. That would be spirit, although it may be described by people of different cultures in significantly different ways. Regardless, it exists, it is, it happens. This sense of what might first be felt as simpatico, as commonalities, as something that is understood and felt rather than cognitively analyzed and deduced indicates that it is something a cut below it is foundational, grounding and life affirming in its ability to be inclusive rather than exclusive. It enjoins in freedom and conjoins in love; it is the spirit that resides between¡ªwhich lives inbetween.
Can you touch the wind? No. You can feel it one your face and body, it blows past and around but you cannot touch it. It is not there in the there dimensional sense, available for human experience only as something beyond, outside our own being. Inbetweenness shares some of these same qualities only with the distinct difference that it does not flow from the outside in but from the inside out¡ªto touch both ourselves and others. It too is fully experienced and can change the direction in life of those for whom it exists without preparation, just as the wind. It too is experienced as touching us but of our not being able to reach out and hold it. It flows and connects and infuses love as a natural expression of itself. It is mystery. It is itself without reference beyond itself. Pretty metaphysical sounding in essence. It moves without being of its own. It initiates action without physical dimension and it sustains life without recourse to what resides or live apart from it.
During childhood life and all it means is related to me¡ªto my needs, demands and all the essentials required for sustenance, protection and nurturance, hopefully of our potential to grow, flower and arrive at the gates of self-reflective awareness is some integrated and fully functional way. Despite life¡¯s challenges and obstacles, it is possible to transcend, to prevail, to ultimately, successfully.
As a vulnerable, inquisitive and needful youngster the meaning and function of others in life are simply restricted to the one meaning of the source, the provider, the vast array of what is possible and necessary to sustain the existence of what exists, that which is embedded most firmly in the unknown as yet, cosmos of human existence and reality.
As time carries one into future and newly emerging patterns of growth, psychological and physical development, the world itself and those most significant to sustained existence begin to renew themselves as centers of polarity. There comes a time early in life, around two years or a little earlier when all in life is not accessible for one¡¯s own satisfaction¡ªa space opens up inbetween I want and you cannot. One learns no! But besides the denial of what has been accessible and now has established a limit, now a glimmer of reflective awareness as a center of independent action begins to be a presence in the presence of another or others who occupy and somehow can now deny my space.
We become a participant as well as and inhabitant of a world of barriers, of doors now which close rather than remaining always open. Darkness appears. The future is born.
The opening up of a space, the birth of distance from is and expression, a natural one, of the experienced condensation of becoming a self-reflected being, an enlightened center of vision, a source of action by which the I emerges to envision its own being.
From this moment in time the doors of freedom and unity with the cosmos, the veil of inclusiveness is rendered. The sense of I am apart from all this is begins to spread its wings. Then treasures of heaven of unknowing are locked from experience as it has been known via the physical being. Awareness shines.
It is one¡¯s space which opens up inbetween the budding awareness and the recognition that there is an other¡ªindeed many others¡ªwhich distances experience of self from the all. This is the natural emergence and dynamic human creation of one experience and reality of inbetweenness.
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(Written at 7:30 p.m. Wednesday, February 5, 1992)
